Some people express themselves through art. They paint, draw, sculpt, design, or otherwise use their hands to make what they are feeling in some way visible or tangible. For me, I express myself through words. I write letters, scribble lines of poetry, & hold great song lyrics to the same level of importance as beloved quotes from classic literature. I love that, no matter what, I can always find a word to describe what i’m experiencing.
This year, there have been a few words on my heart in terms of my goals, happiness, & overall wellbeing: honest, intentional, & real. I haven’t been able to get them out of my head recently, so I thought i’d say what they mean to me in the best way I know how— by writing it down.
Honesty is more than just not lying. It is something that, when made a habit, can be quite liberating. I used to spend so much time and energy tiptoeing around the feelings of others because I thought my honest thoughts wouldn’t be what they wanted to hear. The truth is, most people value the thoughtfulness of an honest opinion.
I’ve learned that honesty is essential in my relationships, both with others and myself. Being honest with people means I get to be true to myself and my own thoughts. It’s empowering.
Being intentional was a difficult idea for me to grasp. I used to put intentional in the same pile as motivated and driven. While these words do share some similarities, they are far from synonymic. To me, being intentional can apply to almost anything. I like to associate being intentional with being purposeful. I often ask myself, “what is my purpose in doing this?”. There’s no wrong answer, but it’s still essential to ask myself that question because otherwise, I find myself putting energy into things that I don’t really see as important in the long run.
I started my own content service, Socially Speaking, as a result of this question. A few months ago, I was frustrated because I had a job that I didn’t really love. It wasn’t important to me and I wanted to be intentional with my time and energy, so I decided to put in the work and make a change that reflected my intentions.
I’ve ended and rethought relationships because of this question as well. I’ve had to think about what’s best for me and my happiness vs. what “just works” in a friendship or relationship.
Being intentional means having a sense of focus. It means that, despite failures, mistakes, and mishaps, I still have a clear idea of where I want to be.
I have to keep it real. I get caught up in what i’m feeling so much sometimes that it seems like I don’t know what’s genuine and what’s not. My feelings are a great indicator of what needs work and attention in my life, or just in my current mood.
The other day, I came across an Instagram post in my feed. It was posted by a girl I know fairly well, and she included a picture from her brand new website, which looked amazing. It reminded me of something I would do. I instantly felt jealous. I knew I could do the same thing, but she had done it before me. I took a step back and reminded myself to be real. What this really meant was that one of my friends had done something awesome. It meant that we have more in common than I had originally thought. As I thought through this, my feelings changed from jealousy to inspiration.
I’m still figuring it out. Until I do, I’ll use words to help navigate me through it all.
XX,
C&C