Thrifty Girl 101: A Step-by-Step Guide to Finding the Best Secondhand Clothing

Shooting in thrifted Levi’s and a vintage knit sweater.

Thrifting a cardigan at The Blue Door in Santa Barbara, California.

Posing with my favorite pup Cori at one of my Charleston pop-ups.

Thrifting with Aiken St. Happy Hour in Mount Pleasant, SC.

In a thrifted t-shirt from the $1 bin!

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Thrifting is an art.

It can be extremely rewarding, exciting, & completely exasperating all at the same time. When searching for the perfect secondhand piece, there are a few things to keep in mind. Follow these guidelines & you’ll be a certified thrifting queen in no time:

Shop multiple stores frequently.

It’s no secret that most thrift stores go through merchandise quickly due to low prices, customer volume, & donation rate. That’s why it’s important to check your favorite thrift spots regularly! Hit up one thrift shop each time you go out for errands or when you have a little bit of free time. You never know when new items will hit the floor.

Keep an open mind.

Walk in the door with a willing mindset. Scan through every aisle, including the men’s & children’s sections. Your new favorite oversized sweatshirt or cropped tank top could be waiting for you behind a paint-stained t-shirt or a pair of baby booties. The loungewear section can be, & usually is, filled with questionable boxers & grannie pajamas, but keep your eyes peeled for lace-trimmed pieces & satin nighties that can be transformed into a chic ensemble.

Search for upscale materials.

While most extremely expensive designer items are hard to come by in thrift shops like Goodwill & the like, you can absolutely find genuine leather, cashmere, silk, & other materials that retail for high prices. Peruse the outerwear section for a cool, retro leather jacket or a cashmere boyfriend-fit sweater.

Don’t skip the accessories.

PSA: DO NOT SLEEP ON THRIFTED ACCESSORIES. For one, you have the opportunity to find a rare, old-school bag or piece of jewelry that will require you to reply “It’s vintage” when someone asks where they can get one, too. I firmly believe that behind tattered Vera Bradley totes & strings of plastic pearls lie some of the best gems in secondhand apparel. Oh, & always always look at the belts rack.

Brave the home section.

Just do it. The horrors of decade-old crusty muffin tins & tea kettles from the Civil War era give way to some truly eclectic stuff. I’ve found hand-written recipe collections, vintage picture frames, & so much more. Thrifty Girl challenge: design a fabulous & simply divine bar cart situation using thrifted glassware, cocktail books, & accoutrement.

Above all, thrifting should be a fun & exciting search. It’s an inexpensive way to fill free time & a great activity to enjoy with friends. Some of my all-time favorite spots include Goodwill, The Salvation Army, charity thrift stores, and chains like Uptown Cheapskate and Plato’s Closet. If you’re in NYC, be sure to check out Beacon’s Closet, Buffalo Exchange, and L Train Vintage. Be sure to follow my virtual closet sale page on Instagram @cornbreadandcashmerecloset and stay tuned for future Charleston pop up dates!

Happy thrifting!

XX,

C&C

Keep an open mind.

Walk in the door with a willing mindset. Scan through every aisle, including the men’s & children’s sections. Your new favorite oversized sweatshirt or cropped tank top could be waiting for you behind a paint-stained t-shirt or a pair of baby booties. The loungewear section can be, & usually is, filled with questionable boxers & grannie pajamas, but keep your eyes peeled for lace-trimmed pieces & satin nighties that can be transformed into a chic ensemble.

Search for upscale materials.

While most extremely expensive designer items are hard to come by in thrift shops like Goodwill & the like, you can absolutely find genuine leather, cashmere, silk, & other materials that retail for high prices. Peruse the outerwear section for a cool, retro leather jacket or a cashmere boyfriend-fit sweater.

Don’t skip the accessories.

PSA: DO NOT SLEEP ON THRIFTED ACCESSORIES. For one, you have the opportunity to find a rare, old-school bag or piece of jewelry that will require you to reply “It’s vintage” when someone asks where they can get one, too. I firmly believe that behind tattered Vera Bradley totes & strings of plastic pearls lie some of the best gems in secondhand apparel. Oh, & always always look at the belts rack.

Brave the home section.

Just do it. The horrors of decade-old crusty muffin tins & tea kettles from the Civil War era give way to some truly eclectic stuff. I’ve found hand-written recipe collections, vintage picture frames, & so much more. Thrifty Girl challenge: design a fabulous & simply divine bar cart situation using thrifted glassware, cocktail books, & accoutrement.

Above all, thrifting should be a fun & exciting search! It’s an inexpensive way to fill free time & a great activity to enjoy with friends.

Notes on Honesty, Intentionality, and Being Real with Yourself

Some people express themselves through art. They paint, draw, sculpt, design, or otherwise use their hands to make what they are feeling in some way visible or tangible. For me, I express myself through words. I write letters, scribble lines of poetry, & hold great song lyrics to the same level of importance as beloved quotes from classic literature. I love that, no matter what, I can always find a word to describe what i’m experiencing.

This year, there have been a few words on my heart in terms of my goals, happiness, & overall wellbeing: honest, intentional, & real. I haven’t been able to get them out of my head recently, so I thought i’d say what they mean to me in the best way I know how— by writing it down.

Honesty is more than just not lying. It is something that, when made a habit, can be quite liberating. I used to spend so much time and energy tiptoeing around the feelings of others because I thought my honest thoughts wouldn’t be what they wanted to hear. The truth is, most people value the thoughtfulness of an honest opinion.

I’ve learned that honesty is essential in my relationships, both with others and myself. Being honest with people means I get to be true to myself and my own thoughts. It’s empowering.

Being intentional was a difficult idea for me to grasp. I used to put intentional in the same pile as motivated and driven. While these words do share some similarities, they are far from synonymic. To me, being intentional can apply to almost anything. I like to associate being intentional with being purposeful. I often ask myself, “what is my purpose in doing this?”. There’s no wrong answer, but it’s still essential to ask myself that question because otherwise, I find myself putting energy into things that I don’t really see as important in the long run.

I started my own content service, Socially Speaking, as a result of this question. A few months ago, I was frustrated because I had a job that I didn’t really love. It wasn’t important to me and I wanted to be intentional with my time and energy, so I decided to put in the work and make a change that reflected my intentions.

I’ve ended and rethought relationships because of this question as well. I’ve had to think about what’s best for me and my happiness vs. what “just works” in a friendship or relationship.

Being intentional means having a sense of focus. It means that, despite failures, mistakes, and mishaps, I still have a clear idea of where I want to be.

I have to keep it real. I get caught up in what i’m feeling so much sometimes that it seems like I don’t know what’s genuine and what’s not. My feelings are a great indicator of what needs work and attention in my life, or just in my current mood.

The other day, I came across an Instagram post in my feed. It was posted by a girl I know fairly well, and she included a picture from her brand new website, which looked amazing. It reminded me of something I would do. I instantly felt jealous. I knew I could do the same thing, but she had done it before me. I took a step back and reminded myself to be real. What this really meant was that one of my friends had done something awesome. It meant that we have more in common than I had originally thought. As I thought through this, my feelings changed from jealousy to inspiration.

I’m still figuring it out. Until I do, I’ll use words to help navigate me through it all.

XX,

C&C

4 Trader Joe's Beauty Products You Need to Try

Trader Joe’s is the new Target. There, I said it.

I get genuinely excited each time I take a trip to TJ’s. I love the cute plants waiting outside, the flowers when you walk in, & the free samples. I’ve recently tried some Trader Joe’s beauty & skincare products. Bottom line: i’m blown away. Here are my top 4 (so far):

4. Cucumber & Citrus Wipes

The Best part: They smell amazing!

Why I love them: These are great for any time of day. I use them to help me wake up in the morning, while freshening up before a night out, or to clean up after a long dance rehearsal.

Price: $3.99

3. Blueberry & Acai Facial Scrub

The best part: It smells like fresh, clean fruit!

Why I love it: This face scrub makes my face feel so clean. I like to use it once or twice a week in the morning to help me wake up. The results? Soft, even, radiant skin!

Price: $6

2. Hyaluronic Moisture Boost Serum

The best part: It’ll change your skin. Seriously.

Why I love it: I was unconvinced that this would actually do anything for me at first, but after using this once a day for a week, I never want to go without it. This serum helps build up your skin’s natural moisture barrier, which in turn makes your skin look hydrated, healthy, & fabulous.

Price: $8.99

1. Ultra Hydrating Gel Moisturizer

   The best part: You’ll never look for another moisturizer.

   Why I love it: This is my holy grail beauty product. It’s a gel formula, so it isn’t super heavy and won’t clog your pores. It’s perfect for morning, night, all four seasons, and everything in between. Plus, it’s been compared to the Creme de La Mer. Need I say more?

   Price: $8.99

   XX,

   C&C
   
   

What to Wear to a Wine Tasting (& other fun things in the Napa area)

California was a dream.

Between the wine tastings, landscape views, & the crisp fresh air, I was in heaven. If you’re planning a trip to wine country & the Napa area, check out what we did, wore & saw:

Wine Tastings:

Heitz Cellar

The Prisoner Wine Company

Silver Oak

When dressing for a wine tasting, keep it semi-casual & cute. At Heitz Cellar, I opted for warm neutrals & my favorite Lack of Color wool hat.

FoodFoodFoodFood

A look at what & where we ate in the Napa area…

Thanksgiving Dinner at The Restaurant at Meadowood

Chicken soup & cocktails at The Grill at Meadowood

English muffins (the very best) from The Model Bakery

To-die-for local charcuterie & cheese from Cowgirl Creamery

A yummy last meal at Farmstead at Long Meadow Ranch

Take a look…

Here are some more scenes & snapshots from our time in Napa (& the Bay area!):

XX,

C&C

How to Eat, Drink, & Shop Your Way Through New Orleans

At Canal Place. Top is All Saints, Jeans are AG, shoes are Urban Outfitters, and bag is Rebecca Minkoff.

A beautiful vintage gown from Century Girl.

My personal favorite piece from the Ashley Longshore gallery.

Waiting on a French 75 before dinner at Arnaud’s

Fried fish Po Boy from Royal House. A carb-lover’s dream.

You’ll leave Cafe du Monde with a sugar high and sticky fingers. It’s totally worth it.

Fried chicken hummus & fresh-out-of-the-oven pita bread at Shaya.

Bread Pudding Soufflé at Commanders Palace.

Pecan Pie Parfait at Commanders Palace.

Vintage ball gown at Century Girl.

A few weeks ago, I visited New Orleans for the first time. As a newcomer in the Crescent City, I was instantly hooked by the classic southern architecture, fantastic food, & dangerously awesome open container laws. Here’s everything we did, saw, & ate while exploring the Big Easy:

Shopping

The shopping in New Orleans includes the perfect mix of eclectic local finds & big-name stuff. If you’re looking to shop designer or chain stores, check out Canal Place. There, you’ll find standard favorites like Saks, Louis Vuitton, Tory Burch, & Anthropologie.

If you’re looking for more one-of-a-kind shops, head over to Magazine Street. This (long) stretch of shops, bars, & restaurants will keep you occupied for hours. Make sure you check out Century Girl, an upscale vintage and designer shop with everything from 70’s Gucci Jewelry to vintage silk robes & wedding dresses. This place looks like the inside of your impossibly chic grandmother’s closet. You’ll definitely find something special to take home with you.

The Ashley Longshore gallery on Magazine is another must-do. Her artwork is packed with personality and a punch. Stop in & take it in, even just to find some inspiration & a smile.

Drinking

New Orleans is the place to be for a great cocktail. You shouldn’t come to the city and not enjoy a French 75, a delicious, slightly tart champagne cocktail. For this, go to Arnaud’s French 75 Bar. This cozy spot gets crowded quick, but most people only stay for one or two before or after dinner, so it’s not hard to snag a table after a few minutes of eyeing someone who is signing their check.

Another classic NOLA haunt is the Carousel Bar inside Hotel Monteleone. Again, it’s hard to grab a spot at the bar (it’s an actual revolving carousel, so who wouldn’t want to have a drink there?) so try your luck and see what happens.

If you want to hear some great live music, head down to Frenchmen Street. It’s a whole lot of fun without all the craziness of Bourbon Street. Music spills out from every bar and you can easily spend an entire night there without cabbing anywhere else.

Eating

Of course, I saved the best for last. I wish I could have gumbo every single day of my life. I ordered it three days in a row in New Orleans. Our first dinner was at Restaurant R’evolution, which ruined all other food for me. Forever. If you’re looking for a nice dinner in New Orleans, look no further.

For a casual lunch spot, we stumbled upon The Royal House. It’s a cute cafe in the middle of the French Quarter (think Po Boys, shrimp, oysters, & giant Bloody Marys). Ask to sit on the upstairs porch if it’s not too warm outside.

Next up was the impossibly trendy and fun Jack Rose. It’s in the Pontchartrain Hotel. Here you’ll see one of Ashley Longshore’s greatest works, a canvas featuring Lil Wayne holding the Jack Rose signature dessert, a mile high ice cream pie. It’s the perfect photo-op before you head to your table. Here I continued on my gumbo tour, & this one certainly did not disappoint.

Jack Rose is the perfect place for a celebration. We saw birthday & bachelorette groups drinking out of Chambongs and getting down to the eclectic playlist. This is NOT the place if you’re looking for a calm. quiet dinner!

Beignets are an institution in New Orleans, but don’t just go anywhere for them. Cafe du Monde is the #1 pick if you want the real experience. Pro tip: don’t wait in the giant line! All you have to do is find an unoccupied table in the covered area & a server will be over to greet you shortly. You’ll be full of sugar & coffee before you know it.

*Check out this list for other noteworthy places to grab a plate of Beignets in New Orleans.

Shaya is the perfect place to go once (or if) you get tired of traditional New Orleans creole dishes. Mediterranean flavors rule here & you can expect to eat the best hummus & pita you’ve ever had. The back garden area is a great place to sit & have a mimosa for lunch. Everything is family-style, so order a handful of items for the table!

If you want to do a Jazz Brunch, spring for the Commanders Palace experience. It felt like I was in Disney World the entire time (in the best way possible).

The menu is pre fixe-style. I chose to start with a French 75 &biscuit with gravy and fried oysters. Our entrees ranged from pork & eggs benedict, pecan-crusted gulf fish, & blackened shrimp.

Around the time we got our entrees, the band showed up to give us a private show in our secluded room. It was such a memorable experience. They even let us put in a request for them to play!

Everything was amazing at Commanders Palace, from the drinks, to the music, to the A+ service. All of this, however, could not compare to the dessert we enjoyed. The baked apple crisp with homemade spice cake made me feel all the Fall goodness I could ever dream of. The deconstructed praline pecan pie parfait was creamy, dreamy, & delicious. The next, though, was the bread pudding soufflé, which was the clear overall winner. Underneath a soft meringue topping was a hot bowl of bread pudding. Our server topped it with a hot maple whiskey sauce & we were in heaven. Don’t miss out on this place.

Apples with Spice Cake at Commanders Palace.

Heavenly seafood gumbo at Restaurant R’evolution.

With Lil Wayne at the Ashley Longshore gallery.

A view from the park while walking to get morning coffee and beignets.

XX,

C&C

@cornbreadandcashmere

@cornbreadandcashmerecloset

4 Ways to Pamper Yourself in Charleston

I post a lot about my travels to other cities how great it is to travel, but sometimes it’s necessary to brag on your own home base. Charleston has my whole heart and i’m finding new and exciting things to do here almost every single day.

When I come home from traveling, I’m always ready for some Holy City R&R. The best way to do that, in my opinion, is by doing something calming for myself (and by myself). Here are my top five picks for beauty-based self care in Charleston, SC:

1. DryBar (Hair)

   Oh, DryBar. I can almost smell the mixture of candle-scented air and signature hair products now. Here, you can get your hair washed and blown out for $45 (with a glass of bubbly) and come out feeling brand new. They use only their own line of products and everything smells like heaven. Try the Floater, an extra and completely necessary scalp massage to renew your noggin.

2. Allure Nails

As a busy gal, I don’t have time to spend hours getting a pedi and gel manicure. It can be tedious to sit & wait with foil-wrapped fingers as your polish soaks off, only to wait even longer for your nail tech to actually get the job done. At Allure, this is far from the case. Conveniently located next to the Whole Foods in West Ashley (for the perfect post-nails lunch) Allure is clean, quick, & chic. The extremely kind & efficient staff works hard to get you in & out so you can get on with your life. They’ll put you up in a comfy pedicure chair and, most of the time, two nail techs will be working on your nails at once. You’ll feel pampered & fresh without losing an entire afternoon. Sip on a free mimosa & watch one of the many TVs with content ranging from CBS to The Kardashians.

3. The Woodhouse Day Spa

Speaking of an efficient beauty routine, The Woodhouse has got you covered. It’s located just across the bridge from Downtown in Mount Pleasant. The best part? Each of the Woodhouse services is thoughtfully priced, so it won’t break the bank if you’re in need of a massage/facial combo. The relaxation room is a place of cozy serenity where you can read a fashion mag & sip on some herbal tea or a glass of prosecco, in case you’re sensing a theme here with the bubbles. This place is great for a Saturday well spent or a post-work treat.

4. Charleston Glow (Tanning)

Feeling a little less than bronzed after Summer? Charleston Glow has got you covered. This place is my go-to for any Fall/Winter event. It’s a cute little place tucked away in the Belle Hall shopping center, conveniently located across from one of my favorite boutiques, II Brunettes. The staff is always sweet & I LOVE how my tan looks afterwards. I’m a generally fair person, so the light option is my jam. Get the Blushtan and thank me later.

Get out there & get pampered, y’all!

XX,

C&C

Your New Favorite Summer-to-Fall Dress

Just dropping in to let you know that, even though stores are bringing out their fall merchandise, it still indeed feels like summer. I pass by boutiques & window shop, longing for the day I can wear a cardigan outdoors without looking like I just finished hot yoga.

Luckily, I have found the perfect summer-fall transition dress for when you’re not feeling like wearing blatant summer colors or beachwear:

Dress is Scotch & Soda. Shoes are Dolce Vita. Shades are RayBan.

This dress is a go-to, from the beach, to happy hour, to a weekend shopping trip. The full, warm rosebud color makes for a late summer statement or a casual fall favorite. Pair this with sandals and a neutral-colored bag on warmer days or with a distressed denim jacket and booties later in the year.

Here’s to dreaming of cooler weather!

XX,

C&C

72 Hours in SoCal

July in southern California is what I wish every day could be like here in Charleston. The cool evenings require a light jacket and the zero percent humidity makes for great hair days! Earlier this month, I took a few days to venture over to the west coast, and it was nothing less than perfect. Check out what I packed into a 3 day stay:

Day 1: Venice Beach

Shopping on Abbot Kinney Blvd. Sweater: Forever 21. Pants: Zara. Top: Urban Outfitters. Bag: Rebecca Minkoff.

Dinner at The Rose Cafe in Venice. Try the sweet corn agnolotti!

Nightcap at our dreamy hotel, The Viceroy.

Day 2: Santa Monica & Malibu

A quick breakfast sandwich at Mel’s Drive-In.

A quick drive up the PCH will land you at The Malibu Village, a must-visit California shopping destination.

The Malibu Pier is perfect for views & photos. It’s less touristy than the Santa Monica pier & perfect for watching crowds of surfers ride the waves!

Day 3: Hollywood & Beverly Hills

This photo of me was taken at the pop-up Louis Vuitton exhibit & shop on Rodeo Drive. This colorful (and free) exhibition takes you through years of LV history, designs, and collaborations. A great activity when you need a break from shopping!

Life is about balance, & balance means going straight from the Beverly Wilshire Hotel on Rodeo to In-N-Out Burger in Hollywood for BOTH a chocolate and strawberry milkshake. This is the face of a girl who is contemplating how she might ship her clothes and cat to California so she doesn’t have to go back to South Carolina. Sigh. Jumpsuit: Alice + Olivia.

Here’s to the next weekend trip!

XX,

C&C

3 Summer Handbags You Need In Your Closet

Is it just me, or is everyone on a continuous search for the perfect white handbag? While my closet boasts a few gems in terms of summery purses, i’m always looking for the next best thing. Here are my top 3:

1. The Everyday One

On sale for $99 from Rebecca Minkoff

This bag screams Miami summer. Even if you’re sitting at a desk instead of sipping a frozen cocktail, this bag is a perfect addition to your summer wardrobe. It’s the kind of throw-everything-inside-&-go bag that I love.

2. The Beachy One

On sale for $19 (yes, you read that right!) from Urban Outfitters

Ah, another great bag for the perpetually late girl. This one pairs well with a good novel, sun, & sand. Did I mention it’s under twenty bucks?

3. The Fancy One

Included in the New York Magazine x Marc Jacobs collection. $450

What’s a summer vacation without a little splurge? This dreamy tote from Marc Jacobs is on my goals board for 2019. It’s perfect for the office, the airport & even date night.

XX,

C&C

Vintage Vegas (& other summer-inspired looks)

It’s 90 degrees in South Carolina. Last weekend, I was in Las Vegas. It was 90 degrees.

When I think about Vegas clothes, I think about blingy, loud, campy outfits that speak for themselves. Vegas style embraces grandeur from both the past & present. It celebrates the weird and shocking designs that turn heads. However, I think the Vegas vibe can be adopted almost anywhere, from the pool to the cocktail bar, even all the way to the grocery store.

If you’re like me & can’t seem to escape the heat, take a look at these summer outfits:

A vintage jumpsuit & vest from my grandmother’s closet. Headband made from a cotton tank top. Shoes are M. Gemi

Gold hoops, a Kate Spade clutch, & Alice & Olivia shades add some modern flair to a vintage outfit.

Patent leather M. Gemi sandals add a bit of freshness to this vintage outfit.

Betsy’s look is perfect for keeping cool on record breaking hot days. Sam Edelman shoes, Alice & Olivia sleeveless top.

White sneakers brighten up any daytime outfit. Sam Edelman faux leather sneakers, vintage wrap top and pants.

White is always a good idea. These breezy crochet pants, white bikini & off the shoulder top are super affordable from Forever 21. Madewell sun hat.

LeSpecs shades.

XX,

C&C

Letting Go

Now that summer is almost here, life seems to be coming back into focus.  The past few months have been a bit of a blur with school, work, dance rehearsals, and trying to fit in some time for friends and family.  

I noticed this exhaustingly fast pace, interestingly, only as it began to slow down.  Last week, I was sitting in my living room with two of my friends.  It was raining and we were talking about our plans for the upcoming week.  We made tentative plans to cook dinner together the next day.  While halfway focused on this conversation and halfway focused on my social media feeds, I happened upon a video.  It was one of those accidentally-viral clips of someone's pet doing something weird and hilarious.  I instantly and almost involuntarily let out a long, loud laugh.  It wasn't a polite or fleeting laugh.  It was an ugly belly laugh.  It felt good, and the feeling remained in me, like I had released something that had been weighing on me.  While I was catching my breath, my friend said, "Wow, I haven't heard you laugh like that in such a long time".  

I instantly wondered why.  

Why can't we, in the middle of our hectic lives, let out a good laugh?  Why can't we stop and breathe and just note the goodness in our lives, or focus on our own wellbeing for a moment?  

It's something I'm now striving to do for myself.  It's something I want all of my loved ones to know and take advantage of.  It's important to stop, take a second, and let go.  Let go of the tension in your shoulders.  Let go of the seriousness in your face.  Let go of the one thought that has been dragging you down all day.  Let go of negativity and hold tightly to positivity.  

It's simple, and it can be done in very simple ways, like:

• lighting a candle in your workspace
• stopping everything for five minutes to have a coffee break
• stretching
• scheduling a self-care session (Manicure, spa treatment, face mask at home, using an essential oil diffuser, etc)
• calling a friend just to talk
• calling your mom just to talk
• Writing about your day
• Writing about your goals
• Creating something 

XX

10 Things You Learn in Your 20's

Let me preface this post by saying that I don't know everything about being in my 20's, most evidently because I am only 22.  That being said, I have learned what it means to not be a teenager anymore.  For a while I didn't desire the responsibilities of being independent, but now that i'm out here, I wouldn't change anything. 

Don't let "Your 20's" be a cringe-worthy phrase associated with uncertainty and being broke. In the past two years I have strengthened friendships, lived in two new cities, defined my personal style, & travelled with some of the people I love most. I look forward to eight more years of growth. Here's what i've learned so far: 

1. Working multiple jobs at once is an incomparable experience

While living in New York City, I worked as a server, bartender, nanny, and I volunteered at the dance studio where I studied to get discounted classes.  Although the hustle was all too real at times, my schedule gave me the motivation I needed to feel productive every single day. 

2. Vulnerability is Necessary 

Once I realized I didn't know everything, it was like a weight had been lifted.  Learn things. Ask questions. Don't feel inferior  because you don't yet know how to file an insurance claim or do your taxes. 

3. Stop saying "I would never do that"

More importantly, how do you know you don't like something if you've never tried it? News flash, if you're waiting on the right time to change the way you live, this is the opportune moment.  

4. People don't judge you as much as you think

To say that I am a people pleaser is an understatement.  I still struggle with the "what will they think" question, but just grasping the fact that people are more concentrated on themselves than anyone else is crucial. Knowing this can help you choose things YOU love & make you more confident in your own decisions.  

5. It's okay to change your mind (and your dreams)

Don't keep doing something because you "feel like you should".  Follow what makes you so passionate that you have no choice but to speak about it.  Give yourself outlets.  Make change, even when the outcome is uncertain.  

6. Travel whenever you get the chance

Whether it be overseas or simply to another state, putting yourself in a new environment is refreshing & can change your perspective on life. 

7. Love can hurt, but...

It can also be the greatest. Getting to know someone & connecting with them on a deep level is something I take for granted sometimes.  

8. Nurture your values

Even if you are in a room of people who hate everything that you are, stay true to what you know is right.  Stand firm in what you believe is good, trustworthy, & praiseworthy. 

9. Stop saying sorry all the time

Be genuine with your feelings. Walking on eggshells & trying to keep everyone happy is simply impossible.  

10. Live transparently

 Think about who you are.  When you get home.  When you sing in the shower. With the lights off.  When you're not around other people.  Being fully honest & unapologetically yourself can be scary, & i'm still getting there, but so far it has made me feel incredibly liberated & empowered.  

XX

#The52ListsProject : Cheer Up

Happy Monday from Charleston! 

     It's amazing how the summer flew by.  Although it won't feel like fall in the south for a few more weeks, I decided to celebrate the coming season by ending the C&C hiatus with a #52List: 

 

     List the things that cheer you up. 

     I chose this one because it's so simple.  It causes you to think not only about the things that make you happy, but the things that make you feel good when circumstances/life/people make you feel less than 100%. 

    Although i'm a firm believer in the long-shower-giant-glass-of-water-&-a-nap philosophy, here are a few things I love to do when it's not the best day. 

1. Calling my mom, sister, or grandmother.

This deserves the number one spot for a couple of reasons.  I'm very close with my family, and most of them know how to make me laugh or talk me through a situation.  Also, my mom has given some of what are arguably the best pep talks of all time.  

2. Diet Coke

"My name is Lilli and i'm addicted to carbonated, artificially sweetened beverages.."

Or, whatever your favorite cheat food might be. If you don't have one, I recommend Cheetos. The puffy ones. 

3. Laughing hard.

(and not being able to stop)

We all know the feeling. Watch your favorite comedy TV show or call your funniest friend. 

4. Music.

Possibly the most important on the list. Sometimes when I don't feel great, I don't want to talk to anyone or do anything.  Bring on the headphones. Make a playlist. Zone out. 

5. Going on a long walk/run with headphones.

It's like, #4, but with exercise!

6. Reading small talk in my group text. 

Sometimes just talking and laughing about little things can help lift a bad mood or turn a bad day around. 

7. Creating something. 

There are so many ways to do this.  Cooking, writing, making something for someone you love.  Put your energy into something you can call your own. 

8. Reading a book that I can't put down. 

There are few better feelings than finishing a book and immediately wanting to read it again.  Read about something you love. Dive into a different story.  Give your mind a break. 

Make your own list! Write it. Save it. Post it. 

XX, 

C&C

Struggles of an Early Twenty-Something

What's the opposite of "the world is your oyster?"...

I'm currently living out my twenties. As I type this blog.  As i'm ignoring the fact that I have more bills to pay than dollars in my checking account.  As I stay awake wondering what the rest of my life will be like.  As I figure it out with the help of my equally ill-prepared best friends. As I call my mom to ask approximately how long I have until I have to get my own health insurance. 

With the constant trial and error lifestyle, however, comes a sense of individuality & independence.  We're figuring it out.  We're learning how to (sometimes) save money.  We're learning about friendship & love & how to ride the roller coaster that is life.  But sometimes the drop is unexpected & includes some struggles along the track:

You're in that in-the-middle stage of independence 

 sometimes it can be frustrating. I can pay for groceries OR gas, but not both, ok? 

The thought of living in the real world is a close reality

Ice cream for dinner & no bedtime sounds great until rent is due. 

You have to take yourself shopping

ah, the vivid memories of family shopping trips of yesteryear, when you would fight with your sister over a GAP sweatshirt. 

You can't remember the last time you ate a home cooked meal

no, baking a frozen pizza doesn't count. 

After 21, there are no more milestone birthdays you can really look forward to

wear that "  _____'s 21st BDAY BASH" poster board shaped like a margarita with PRIDE.

You're forced to decorate your own living spaces

 "Advanced IKEA furniture assembler" should be socially acceptable to put on a resume..

Having to explain Facebook to the kids you babysit

"It's a lot of weird videos & pictures of dogs, & you kind of just keep scrolling until your eyes hurt".

Navigating the chaos that is the dating world

Always google them before the first date

Not knowing what's to come

Will I ever graduate? Who's going to hire me once I do? Or will E! just use my life as a reality show? 

I still have so many questions, but it's nice to have a group of people to not know the answers with.  The unknown is full of possibility, right? 

XX

C&C

Life According to an Aspiring Artist

To me, Manhattan has never been a place of mixed feelings. You love it or you don't.  You stay away from it, or you let it take you head first until you're hooked. My situation matched the latter. In fact, until about two months ago, I was in a full-on relationship with NYC.  I was in love with everything it offered me.  If you've ever felt that way about anything, you know how hard the breakup can be....hence why my Facebook profile still reads "Lives in NY, NY". Still in the denial phase. 

Like so many others, I went to New York to pursue dreams. Art.  Opportunity.  I worked harder than ever & it felt nice to really go for something.  I put my all into being a dancer, & while I did not get everything I wanted, I learned so much about the industry, improved myself in ways i'm still figuring out, & found out what it means to really do what you love.  

That being said, it was not necessarily a glamorous experience.  Sometimes I found myself really wondering if this is what I was meant to do, but I was reassured and refreshed every time I went back to the dance studio. 

Here's what a normal day looked like:

6:45AM:  my phone alarm wakes me up.  I get up, wash my face, put my hair up, and walk to Starbucks.  My giant dance bag, which is filled with various dance shoes, makeup, snacks, a book, & extra dance clothes, bumps at least 3 people on the street. 

8AM: I arrive at my audition location.  It doesn't start until 9:30, but I'm still considered a non-union dancer, so unless I want to wait all morning, I have to get there early and put my name on the list.  Commence coffee drinking, book reading, and makeup doing.  

9:30AM: The first round of the audition, which is usually the only one. The casting team will keep dancers for multiple rounds, but a majority of people get cut in the beginning.  (Once, a casting director sought me out & told me she thought I was great, but I was just too tall, & that she would keep my information on file.  It was the highlight of my week.)

10:15AM: I leave the audition location & head to the dance studio.  The only good thing about getting a "no" at an audition is being able to take class after.  I take something light and fun, like Commercial Jazz or Theatre from one of my favorite choreographers.  

2:00PM: I leave the dance studio feeling good and search for some much-needed food! I weigh my options, including a smoothie shop, sushi bar, and takeout pizza place.  I choose pizza and vow to get the protein smoothie tomorrow. Time to head back to my apartment for a quick shower. 

3:15PM: I change into my work clothes (Casual, jeans & a t-shirt) and walk 6 blocks to the subway. I put in my headphones & walk fast, probably listening to whatever song I danced to in class that day because it's stuck in my head.  

4:00PM: Work. Either bartending or serving, depending on the day.  Pretty draining, but my co-workers are cool & I get to meet people from around the world.  I take drink orders as they peek up from their city maps only to ask me how to get to the Empire State Building.  

11:00PM: I walk from work to the bank & deposit my tips from the night.  I take a cab home instead of the subway because tomorrow's Saturday & I have to wake up at 5:30AM to babysit.  I go home, get ready for bed, & plan out my dance classes for the following week.  

12:30: Time for sleep. I live above a drag bar, so I have come to rely on the soft thumping of Katy Perry remixes to lull me to sleep from below, before I do it all again next week. 

That sounds crazy to me now. & awesome.  & I know a lot of people who are still doing it.  Shoutout  to everyone out there living the hustle every day!

As for me, I'm reverting back to the things that stole my heart in the first place: art. writing. travel. & dancing for fun.

Do what you love. 

XX, 

C&C

Relentlessly You.

In lieu of mass Superbowl LI sports talk, i'm choosing to focus on what I really watched the game for: the halftime show.  Anyone who knows me knows i've been a Lady Gaga fan since I locked myself in my bedroom at 13, only to emerge after having learned the Bad Romance music video choreography in its entirety. 

Aside from her evident "weird girl" aura, which I very much appreciate & relate to, I became drawn to her music upon realizing its artistic value & edge.  She was doing stuff no one ever did, & not everyone liked it, but guess what...she didn't care.  

Her expressed individuality and courage to be honest & real have inspired countless fans (or Monsters, as she calls them) to be themselves and share their voice with the world.  

Having said that, many internet meanies have since taken to their respective social media outlets to body shame LG for the way her stomach looked during her halftime performance.  And then she gave us this:

"I heard my body is a topic of conversation so I wanted to say, I'm proud of my body and you should be proud of yours too. No matter who you are or what you do. I could give you a million reasons why you don't need to cater to anyone or anything to succeed. Be you, and be relentlessly you. That's the stuff of champions. thank you so much everyone for supporting me. I love you guys. Xoxo, gaga"

In addition to her poised reaction to internet haters, she turns the conversation to focus on oneself & being "relentlessly you".  What if we all lived our lives regardless of what our peers, friends, or society thought? It's something I struggle with every day, but there is so much relief & empowerment in eliminating the "what will they think?" More importantly, who cares what they think? People are going to have their opinions about you no matter what, so do what you feel is right.  Wear an outfit because it compliments your personal style, not because you want compliments. A girl with honest originality is like a breath of fresh air.  

 

"I was never afraid of failure; for I would sooner fail than not be among the greatest." - John Keats

XX, 

C&C

@lilliserral

Best of Beauty 2016

Even though i'm finally getting comfortable writing the date as '17, some things have stuck with me from 2016.  I'm rounding up all the makeup, skincare, & hair products I couldn't live without last year.  Here's to many more knockout products in 2017!

1. NYX HD Finishing Powder

Weightless, Colorless, Flawless! This powder is brightening, yet mattifying for the perfect everyday makeup look. (Also available in yellow for brightening the ender eye area!) Ulta, $9

2. L'Oreal Infallible Foundations

Usually i'm down to splurge on a foundation or BB Cream, but this one gives you the best of both for around $12! Use the matte finish for a long-lasting, full coverage look, or the glow finish for a natural, everyday face! Best applied with a damp BeautyBlender. 

3. Kat Von D Everlasting Liquid Lipsticks 

I spent most of 2016 wearing one of these & trying to get my friends to buy them! These long-lasting colors range from everyday nudes to bold blues, reds and purples.  Easy application & super lightweight feel.  ($20, Sephora)

4. Charlotte Tilbury Lipstick in Kim K.W.

Yep, i'm devoting an entire heading to one shade of lipstick, & for good reason! You've just met the everyday lipstick of all everyday lipsticks.  All i'm saying is this little thing lives in my purse for a reason.  It's hydrating, full coverage, & works with many skin tones.  ($32, Bloomingdales)

5. Milani Blush in Luminoso

The best way to avoid clown cheeks.  This versatile color mimics a romantic, natural flush.  A cult fav. ($6, Drugstores)

6. Laura Mercier Lip Balm 

Who am I kidding? I've loved this stuff for longer than a year. Shoutout to my mom for introducing me to this one! What started out as part of my dance theatre makeup kit has become a day to night favorite.  Whether you're looking for a daytime balm with a touch of color, or a before bed staple, this one's got you covered.  ($22, Sephora)

7. Clinique Take the Day Off Balm 

This cut my nightly routine in half! Just apply a small amount to your face full of makeup, massage with water, & rinse.  The balm melts makeup (Even stubborn mascara & long lasting lipstick) and lifts it gently to remove all remnants of makeup from pores.  Follow up with a facial cleanser & moisturizer! ($29, Sephora)

8. Bumble & Bumble Dryspun Finish Spray

Pros: Weightless, super thickening for all hair types, refreshing, smells amazing

Cons:

($31, Sephora)

9. Drybar Mai Tai Spritzer Sea Salt Spray

Use this for the perfect tousled look, sans heat.  Always natural, never crunchy or greasy! 

($25, Sephora)

10.  MAC Fix+ 

Prime, hydrate, lock-in, & set with one little spray bottle! I use this after applying foundation, then again after my entire makeup look is finished.  Also great for refreshing makeup throughout the day.  ($23, department stores)

XX,

C&C

#The52ListsProject : Characters & People

Wondering what these nine people have in common? Not much, except for being some of my favorite book, play, television & movie characters.  Making this week's list was so much fun because it gave me a chance to look back on different parts of my life & see how these characters fit in.  

Here we go: 

1. Elizabeth Bennet (Pride & Prejudice)

One of the many leading ladies who lead me to discover & rediscover my love for reading.  

Best Traits: brilliantly clever, romantic, sharp, honest

Favorite Quote:  

"How humiliating is this discovery! Yet, how just a humiliation! Had I been in love, I could not have been more wretchedly blind! But vanity, not love, has been my folly. Pleased with the preference of one, and offended by the neglect of the other, on the very beginning of our acquaintance, I have courted prepossession and ignorance, and driven reason away, where either were concerned. Till this moment I never knew myself."

2. Violet (American Horror Story: Murder House)

I watched the entire first season of AHS over the course of three days & nights. Mostly because of her. 

Best traits: utterly cool & blasé, yet kindhearted & unconditionally loving

Favorite Quote:

"I used to think you were like me, you were attracted to the darkness.  But you are the darkness".  

 

3. Angelica Schuyler (Hamilton)

Okay, technically not a fictional character, but I love the way she is portrayed in the musical.

 Best traits: witty, intelligent, independent, brave, selfless

Favorite Quote:

"We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal...and when I meet Thomas Jefferson, imma compel him to include women in the sequel. Work!"

 

4. Jenna (Waitress)

A movie character who became one of my favorite people on Broadway. 

Best traits: persevering, innately good, reliable 

Favorite Quote: "She's imperfect, but she tries/ She is good, but she lies/ She is hard on herself/ She is broken and won't ask for help/ She is messy, but she's kind/ She is lonely most of the time/ She is all of this mixed up and baked in a beautiful pie.."

 

5. Idgie Threadgoode (Fried Green Tomatoes)

A film that constantly reminds me of the importance of great friends & wild minds. 

Best traits: spontaneous, unreserved, one of a kind, good with bees 

Favorite quote: "I found out what the secret to life is: friends. Best friends".  

 

6. Nigel (The Devil Wears Prada)

Don't ask me to explain my obsession with Stanley Tucci, because I cannot. 

Best traits: well spoken, more poised than half the women in New York City, impeccably dressed

Favorite quote:

Andy: "I love that! Will it fit me?"

Nigel: "A little Crisco and some fishing wire and we'll be in business!"

 

7. Eponine (Les Miserables)

Arguably the greatest tale of unrequited love in existence. 

Best traits: loyal, tough, hopelessly & unapolagetically in love

Favorite quote: "Rain will make the flowers grow".  

 

8. Susie Salmon (The Lovely Bones)

Read the book and you'll understand why. Also watch the movie for Stanley Tucci.

Best Traits: youthful, beautiful mind, sees the best in people & the world

Favorite Quote: "I had taken this time to fall in love with the sort of helplessness I had not felt in death- the helplessness of being alive, the dark, bright pity of being human".  

 

9. Ruth (The Bible)

I have been compared to Ruth only once in my life: the day I graduated from high school.  Being spoken of in the likeness of someone of that importance is as special and uplifting as you would think, making Ruth my last and most important character.  

Best traits: patient, respectful, courageous, a great leader, an even better follower

Favorite quote: "But Ruth replied, 'Do not urge me to leave you or to turn back from you.  Where you go, I will go.  Where you stay, I will stay.  Your people will be my people and your God my God' ".   

 

Write down your own favorites.  Strive to bring out their best qualities in yourself. 

 

XX

#The52ListsProject : Goals & Dreams

Making lists is a part of my life. I make lists for things to do, things to buy, outfit ideas, blog concepts, and my personal favorite, wish lists.  When I stumbled upon The 52 Lists Project, I was pleasantly surprised that all of the lists encouraged me to write about things or ideas I already had, or can easily obtain. 

Even if You're not a list person, this book is great for de-stressing, mood boosting, or just setting aside a part of your week to focus on something light hearted & fun! 

The first prompt: "List your goals and dreams for this year"

Here are mine:

• Finish my NYC bucket list  I scribbled it on the back of a restaurant receipt) 
•  
• Live somewhere new & support myself
•  
• Make new, great memories with my family
•  
• write a full-length piece & have it published in a magazine 
•  
• fill my writing journal with stories about my life
•  
• travel to a state i've never been to 
•  
• reconnect with old friends
•  
• learn about a new art form 
•  
• relax
•  
• work hard
•  
• step back & take in something from everyone I meet

Think about your goals & dreams of the next year. write them down. share them. or don't. be realistic but don't let your goals get in the way of anything. 

XX

Top 5: Fall Skincare Must-Haves

^me, pre-fall, pre-haircut. Photographed by my sister in SoHo.

Happy FALL

(!!!)

I realized this season had officially begun only last night after stepping outside in a too-thin shirt & open toe sandals.  Was it 58 degrees? Yes.   Was it also raining? Maybe.  Did I have the slightest intelligence or at least obligatory thought to check my Weather App? Instead of answering that I'm going to ask another question: do you often feel unprepared for the colder months, or "caught in the rain" if you will? (See what I did there?) Okay i'll stop, but seriously.

Winter Skin is not cute.  If you don't know what I mean by this term, odds are you've experienced it at some point in your life, unless you hail from some perpetually warm place close to the equator.  Winter Skin can best be described as dehydrated, wind-chilled, & agitated.  It causes unwanted flaking, texture, redness, & frowning (again. not cute.) But take heart, this can be prevented! It's important to incorporate these into your skincare routine now, as the weather is just changing.  

Here are my top 5 skincare products to keep your skin looking fab during the colder months!

1. Water

Sorry if you're already unimpressed, BUT this one is seriously important, so stop rolling your eyes.  Of course drinking tons of water is so important all the time, but during the winter months, water can be useful in many different ways.  A humidifier adds warm, wet air to a dry place, so it's perfect to place one near your bed at night to help fight off cold & flu grossness.  It helps keep vocal cords from becoming too dry, & it's great for the skin! 

2. Gentle Exfoliant

Notice I used the word gentle. When it's cold, your skin already has a lot going on with wind, cold temps, etc. Don't upset it even more.  I love my Clarasonic deep pore cleanser because even though it mostly just gets dirt & makeup off my face, it also leaves my skin feeling soft & smooth.  The Neutrogena Naturals Pore Cleansing Scrub is also great because the scrubbies (is there a better word for this?) are finely milled & very gentle.  

3. Heavy Moisturizer

Your summer moisturizer just isn't going to cut it.  In the summer, I like to use a moisturizer with a high SPF & a lighter feel.  In the winter, I go for the opposite.  It's great to reach for one that's very gentle but won't irritate the skin, even after being applied 2-3 times a day.  My favorite is the CeraVe Moisturizing Cream.  It is made to be used all over the body, so in the winter, I use it on my face because it creates a "skin barrier" while still feeling light, even on sensitive skin.  The main ingredient is Glycerin, which acts like a protective mask underneath makeup.  

4. Facial Spray

Sometimes, even with all the preparation & moisturizing, your skin just needs a little more.  Facial sprays are perfect for on-the-go touch-ups.  Choose one with vitamins & nourishing ingredients to revive your skin.  I will never stop talking about the Caudalie Beauty Elixir so of course, I will mention this one as my holy grail facial spray.  Other notable spritzers: Mario Badescu Facial Spray with Aloe, Herbs and Rosewater & First Aid Beauty Vitamin Hydrating Mist

5. Restorative Mask

The cold can take a lot out of your skin, so it's  very important to put nourishing goodies back in. While moisturizers do a great job of protecting, sometimes they fall short after a few hours.  Overnight masks can make a world of difference, like this one from Sephora.  For a short 20 minute mask, I recommend using any of the Glam Glow products, but ESPECIALLY the Thirsty Mud Treatment .  It works quickly & smells like the tropical vacation you hallucinate in mid-January.  

XX, 

C&C